69: Then Resist
Shen Jin’s fingers immediately withdrew. He could even see the crimson between Qian Kun’s lips and teeth, an indistinct sensuality rising as the continuously falling rain curtain surrounded the two of them in this ambiguous surge.
The Alpha rolled the candy on his tongue and smiled.
“Sweet.”
Shen Jin barely managed to drag his gaze away. He turned and strode off, and Qian Kun followed with a laugh.
Ke Minghuai stood on the steps. He didn’t leave right away.
He watched the effortless closeness between them. It was rare to see that on Shen Jin. Shen Jin’s defenses were too thick, like an airtight fortress.
This kind of unguarded ease was something Ke Minghuai had never had.
When they brushed past, he held his body rigid, keeping his voice steady. “Is this fair to me?”
A spark flared in Qian Kun’s chest, then Shen Jin stopped him with a look. Qian Kun’s rising fury dropped without him noticing.
Ke Minghuai’s voice turned rough. “I went to training this time because I had a duty to contribute to the school, even the country’s pheromone work. I did what I was supposed to do. I came back and found the engagement cancelled, and my head was blank. The engagement was gone. The fiancée was gone. Isn’t that ridiculous?”
He had left with everything intact. He returned to find he no longer had any relationship with him. He tried to reach out, then everyone told him it was wishful thinking.
Even with Ke Minghuai’s good mentality, he couldn’t help but be affected.
He only wanted everything to go back to how it was.
Qian Kun’s face sank, his hawk-like eyes pinning Ke Minghuai in a cold stare.
Shen Jin simply grabbed Qian Kun’s hand. Both of them were drenched. Staying outside any longer meant getting sick.
Qian Kun had an umbrella, yet he was soaked like this. The reason was obvious without guessing too hard.
Shen Jin flicked a glance over. Qian Kun felt half his body go weak, then he reined himself in, his eyes urging: hurry up.
Shen Jin spoke clearly, step by step. “First, going to training was your choice. The you I know doesn’t blindly blame outside factors.”
Ke Minghuai’s mouth twisted with bitterness. He didn’t expect Shen Jin to still think that highly of him at this point.
“Second, our state before you left wasn’t suited for conversation. You avoided contacting me during that time too.” The drunken incident left Ke Minghuai unsure how to face him for a while. “Third, the most important point. Even if your mother never brought it up, I would’ve brought it up after you returned.”
All these years, I repaid what I owed. I repaid my parents’ upbringing. I repaid the bond you gave me when we were young.
Could I become myself now?
That final line was the most lethal to Ke Minghuai.
Breaking off the engagement wasn’t an impulse. It was Shen Jin’s plan, built over a long time.
Seeing Shen Jin about to leave his sight with someone else, Ke Minghuai stepped forward without realizing. “I have emotional deficiency syndrome!”
Shen Jin turned sharply. Scenes from the past surged up again. Ke Minghuai really did have moments in social situations where his behavior turned oddly off.
He could warn Ke family relatives one moment, then laugh with them the next.
He could create a surprise one moment, then run straight to the lab and shut out the world the next.
It happened so often Shen Jin had gotten used to it.
Shen Jin looked like he had wavered, and Ke Minghuai found confidence again.
“It’s true. The diagnostic records from childhood are still kept.” Ke Minghuai didn’t hesitate to expose his biggest flaw to win Shen Jin back. “Everything you’ve seen, all the social niceties, I worked them out through general psychological modeling. Having you by my side makes me feel like I’m living like a person. Even the doctor said I’ve been getting better...”
Ke Minghuai believed that one day, he could have normal emotions.
Sincerity was what he needed to move Shen Jin. He learned that from Qian Kun.
Shen Jin didn’t keep listening. He realized the warm hand he’d been holding was slick with sweat at some point, gripping hard enough to feel like it might crush bone.
Shen Jin looked over. Qian Kun’s lashes were lowered, a cold expression swallowed by shadow.
Lightning tore the sky outside the second-floor corridor window, lighting up his sharp face. The usual casualness was gone.
So Qian Kun could be afraid too.
Afraid of what?
“Xiao Jin, don’t go, alright?”
Ke Minghuai’s ending note fell heavy and muffled, pressing so hard it was hard to breathe.
He’d already laid down every last card. He only needed Shen Jin’s verdict.
Shen Jin didn’t turn back.
Memories of their years together flickered up anyway. Shen Jin closed his eyes lightly and sealed them deep in his mind.
“I’m sorry.”
...
Ke Minghuai got into his car in the downpour. Rain streamed across the windshield in endless sheets. The wipers couldn’t clear it fast enough.
He had barely reached the highway entrance when he saw the road closure sign. His emotions collapsed. He slammed the steering wheel several times.
A ringtone blared suddenly.
The phone’s light was especially glaring in the dark night.
It stayed lit for a long time, then went dark.
It lit up again. Ke Minghuai finally answered.
It was a video call from Madam Ke.
The Ke family had important guests tonight. A pheromone institution was interested in Ke Minghuai’s recent unexpected breakthrough in extracting pheromones, and the details required him to be present to negotiate. Ke Minghuai would’ve taken it seriously at any other time. He had just come out of the lab tonight. He must’ve received some kind of message, then disappeared in the span of moments.
The guests had been waiting at home for a long time. Madam Ke could only call to rush him.
“Where did you go? What could be more important than...” Her voice broke. “A-Huai, w-why are you crying?”
On the screen, the Alpha who had been diagnosed at three years old as unable to sense others’ emotions, someone who never seemed happy or sad, had tears sliding nonstop from his eyes.
Ke Minghuai stared blankly as he touched the wetness on his face. He hadn’t even noticed.
He looked at the sheen of water on his fingertips.
When they first met, Shen Jin had been a kid who cried easily.
Ke Minghuai had been curious what it was. Shen Jin told him, when someone was really sad, it appeared in their eyes.
His heart hurt so much.
The child he once knew was gone.
*
The two of them walked in silence all the way to Shen Xie’an’s hospital room. It was past midnight. The nurse had turned off most of the corridor lights, leaving the hall in dim half-dark.
Shen Jin’s soft gasp was what dragged one Alpha back to the human world.
Qian Kun snapped awake and released his grip immediately, checking Shen Jin’s fingers carefully for injury.
Shen Jin looked at his reddened fingers and said with no patience, “Do you have a grudge against them?”
“No, I... I didn’t mean to.” Qian Kun held his hand full of self-blame and blew on it.
The warm breath brushed over Shen Jin’s skin. Shen Jin uncomfortably pulled his hand back.
“Couldn’t you tell I was joking?”
“I zoned out for a second. Don’t be mad. It’s my fault.” The Alpha coaxed him clumsily.
“I’m not mad.”
Zoned out? More like you lost your soul.
And besides, weren’t you the one who was angry?
Shen Jin looked at the drenched person in front of him. He looked like a giant dog, almost pitiful. Shen Jin couldn’t bring himself to tease him further.
Shen Jin checked Shen Xie’an first. His brother was sleeping peacefully. Shen Jin went to the single cabinet and took out a set of clothes for Qian Kun. “Go rinse off in there.”
Shen Jin had prepared plenty of daily necessities for his brother before coming to care for him. He brought several sets of clothes too. Shen Xie’an usually liked loose athletic wear in larger sizes.
There wasn’t much to choose from. He could only hope the young master could bear with it.
Qian Kun indeed wasn’t very willing. “You don’t have any for yourself?”
Shen Jin cut off the thought. “I only brought one set. I need it.”
I’m here to care for a patient, not to live comfortably.
Qian Kun went into the bathroom. He braced both hands on the sink and stared at himself in the mirror.
Anger still boiled in his body. He turned on the tap, splashed cold water over his face, then took several deep breaths.
Ke Minghuai’s qualities were already top-tier among Alphas. Nine years of history made it worse.
Just now, one sentence was enough to make Shen Jin stop.
Ke Minghuai knew exactly what to say to soften Shen Jin’s heart.
For one moment, Qian Kun truly worried Shen Jin would be fooled by Ke Minghuai’s raw sincerity.
Those nine years were a gap he couldn’t cross.
He was jealous enough to go crazy.
Qian Kun reached into his pocket for his cigarette case. His pheromones had been rampaging more and more lately. He needed constant suppression.
His 3S mental strength was becoming harder and harder to hide as adulthood drew close.
He pulled out the case, then realized even the last cigarette was gone.
He rushed out to find Shen Jin and didn’t bring any of it. Damn it. Qian Kun wiped water from his face in irritation.
A soft knock sounded.
Shen Jin’s voice fell like rain after drought.
“Open the door. I didn’t bring you body wash.”
The moment the door opened, Shen Jin was hit by pheromones that nearly filled the entire bathroom, thick enough to make his chest feel tight.
Betas were usually dull to pheromones. Shen Jin could smell it for one reason, his constitution was special. Another reason existed too, the pheromones were far too strong, so strong a Beta could feel them clearly.
The quick open-and-close let some of the scent leak out.
Alphas loved claiming territory. This kind of overwhelming presence that pressed down on everything else could make anyone except a Beta feel uncomfortable.
Through the thin door, the elderly Alpha who had been lively in the morning shifted uncomfortably and shouted something.
Shen Jin didn’t catch it. He was pinned against the door, and the curses blurred into the background.
Thunder roared outside. Qian Kun lowered his head and complained softly, “I forgot to bring an inhibitor.”
Shen Jin blinked, slow to react. Qian Kun’s scent was too lingering.
Shen Jin had already differentiated. Even if he could smell it, his body wouldn’t respond with heat the way it used to.
Qian Kun noticed Shen Jin’s calm too. It felt like a carnival meant for him alone.
Jealousy that hadn’t cooled yet spread like wildfire. He wanted to mess Shen Jin up.
Looking into Shen Jin’s clear eyes, Qian Kun remembered those friends always laughing at him for being shameless, for using every trick available.
He was shameless. So what?
Shamelessness was the only reason Shen Jin could end up in his arms at all.
“Is it okay?”
“Huh?... Ah!”
Shen Jin hadn’t processed it yet. His body was turned halfway, his back facing the Alpha.
Riiip.
The suppression patch was torn off.
“If you don’t like it, then resist”
The words fell. He leaned in.
Shen Jin gasped, feeling a fierce force. His lashes trembled violently.
Pheromones poured in without pause. Shen Jin trembled and lifted his neck, like a swan offering itself to the blade.
The Alpha’s overwhelming presence filled the entire space.
A flicker of anger rose in Shen Jin, then a large hand began stroking the side of his neck, gentle as flowing water wrapping around him. A finger curled a lock of his hair lightly. Shen Jin shifted, uneasy.
He moved once and felt hard pectoral muscle.
Huh?
Hold on. Something was off.
Shen Jin’s foggy thoughts cleared a little. He tested it and increased how much he moved.
A hint of resistance appeared, then dry hands seized his attacking hands and locked them down. The whole process was forceful and slow, continuing until his arms were pressed fully above his head.
Shen Jin said nothing.
There was nowhere on his entire body he could move, and his neck was also firmly held by the Alpha.
I am trying to resist.
How about giving me some space to work with here?
Author’s Note:
Qian Qian: If you don’t like it, resist.
Jin Jin: ...
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