I’ve Been Drinking My Own Vinegar for Months?
Ji Chaoyun felt alternately freezing cold and burning hot. He did not even notice when he reverted to his true form.
The little silver dragon thrashed painfully beneath the water, sending wave after wave rippling across the surface.
After an unknown amount of time, the turbulent water finally grew calm.
“Chaoyun!”
Feng Qi dove beneath the water. Ji Chaoyun, who had returned to human form, lay at the bottom of the pool with his eyes tightly shut, seemingly unconscious.
Feng Qi carried him out of the water, hastily wrapped him in a robe, and quickly brought him back to the bedroom.
Ji Chaoyun’s body was still somewhat feverish. Feng Qi laid him on the bed, pulled the quilt over him, and called softly, “Chaoyun, how do you feel?”
There was no response.
Feng Qi sent his spiritual power into Ji Chaoyun’s spirit meridians and found that the other’s spiritual power had already stabilized.
Yet the furrow between his brows did not ease.
He placed his hand over the core at Ji Chaoyun’s chest and once again sent a trace of spiritual power inside.
Within Ji Chaoyun’s body, pure power slowly flowed from the core through his limbs and every part of his body before returning to the core. The spiritual power within him was constantly transforming, continually fading away and being reborn, thoroughly cleansing away his former half-yao constitution.
And at the source of all that power, slowly revolving within the core, was a newly formed spiritual core.
It was...
A Dragon Pearl.
All the strength seemed to leave Feng Qi’s body at once. He sank to his knees beside the bed and remained there for a long while before finally letting out a long, slow breath.
A dragon could form only one Dragon Pearl in its lifetime. It was something they were born with. There was absolutely no possibility of forming a second core through cultivation later in life as mortals could.
Naturally, the Dragon Pearl now inside Ji Chaoyun had not been formed anew.
As for where this Dragon Pearl had come from, the answer was already obvious.
Feng Qi had always been remarkably perceptive. The moment this Dragon Pearl appeared, many of the doubts in his heart finally had answers: those inexplicable images that had appeared in his mind, the Phoenix Clan’s strange attitude toward him, and the many times Ji Chaoyun had seemed to want to tell him something, only to stop himself.
Yet now that the truth was truly before his eyes, Feng Qi was not nearly as shocked or bewildered as he had imagined he would be.
Feng Qi straightened and gently traced Ji Chaoyun’s brows and cheek with his fingers, a bittersweet smile touching his lips. “No wonder your cultivation has advanced so quickly lately. No wonder you’ve always had so much weighing on your mind yet didn’t dare tell me. Fool...”
Ji Chaoyun remained completely unaware in his sleep. His expression was peaceful, and as the Dragon Pearl gradually stabilized, color slowly returned to his face.
☁
The process of reforming his core and rebuilding his foundation lasted an entire day and night. It was not until the following night that Ji Chaoyun finally stirred awake.
The instant he opened his eyes, he noticed the changes in his body.
He raised a hand to his chest. The Dragon Pearl he had been separated from for so long was revolving there, warm and steady, as though all the turmoil of these past years had merely been an absurd dream that had never existed.
Ji Chaoyun’s eyes abruptly reddened.
A sound came from outside the door. Ji Chaoyun hurriedly wiped his eyes.
Feng Qi entered carrying a bowl of medicinal soup. He quickly walked to the bedside, placed the medicine on the small table beside the bed, then bent down and touched Ji Chaoyun’s forehead.
“Finally, you’re not burning up anymore.” Feng Qi said, “You had a fever for an entire day and night. I found some nourishing spirit herbs to help stabilize your cultivation. Drink this first.”
Ji Chaoyun opened his mouth as though he wanted to say something, but Feng Qi gave him no opportunity. He picked up the bowl, scooped out a spoonful, blew on it until it cooled, then held it to Ji Chaoyun’s lips.
Ji Chaoyun could only obediently drink it.
Feng Qi fed him the entire bowl one spoonful at a time, then wiped his lips with a silk handkerchief. Only after tidying everything away did he return to sit beside the bed.
“Do you want to sleep a little longer? Does anywhere still feel uncomfortable?”
“No.”
Feng Qi’s expression remained gentle and natural as he patiently asked, “Then... what do you want to do now? Eat something, or should I read to you?”
“Feng Qi...”
The more Feng Qi behaved this way, the guiltier Ji Chaoyun felt. He could barely bring himself to look at the person before him. Instead, he reached out and ingratiatingly hooked his finger around Feng Qi’s, whispering, “Did you... already figure everything out?”
“Figure out what? That I’ve been drinking my own vinegar for months?”
“...”
Feng Qi sighed and rubbed the corner of Ji Chaoyun’s lips firmly with his thumb. “Look at that aggrieved face of yours. I’m the one all of you kept in the dark. Shouldn’t I be the aggrieved one here?”
“I...” Ji Chaoyun said, “I’m sorry. Don’t be angry.”
Feng Qi did not answer. Instead, he asked, “When did you find out?”
“Mount Sumeru.”
Feng Qi frowned slightly. “Because I opened the seal?”
“No.” Ji Chaoyun said, “Because you drew the demonic poison out of me.”
Feng Qi instantly understood. “The power of the dragon pearl neutralized the demonic poison?”
Ji Chaoyun lowered his eyes and quietly acknowledged it.
“I...” Feng Qi muttered a curse. Thinking back on what had happened then, he did not know whether to laugh or cry. “I thought I was exceptionally gifted and somehow neutralized the poison myself.”
Ji Chaoyun did not dare answer. Suddenly, he was pulled firmly into an embrace.
Feng Qi said softly, “So it wasn’t because I was extraordinarily gifted. Someone had been secretly protecting me all along.”
“...You’re not angry?”
“What would I be angry at you for?” Feng Qi stroked his hair and murmured beside his ear, “For hiding it from me and having fun watching me drink vinegar? Or for trying to completely sever yourself from my past self just so the present me wouldn’t feel uneasy?”
“That’s not what I...”
“I understand.” Feng Qi interrupted him. “You couldn’t bear to let me learn the truth because you couldn’t bear to see me shoulder all those duties and responsibilities again. And likewise, I can’t bear to be angry with you.”
Feng Qi simply rubbed his cheek against Ji Chaoyun’s, then looked into his eyes and said solemnly, “I will never be angry with you.”
“Feng Qi...”
“Besides.” A sly smile appeared on Feng Qi’s face. He lightly bit Ji Chaoyun’s lip. “Didn’t a certain someone already fall for me before he even knew who I was? The two of us are destined for each other. I’m delighted.”
“I...”
Feng Qi continued, “Oh, and a certain someone was so distraught back then because he didn’t know how to face me that he cried and made a scene in front of me. I wonder what he thinks about that now.”
“...” Ji Chaoyun wished the ground would swallow him whole. He whispered weakly, “Don’t... don’t say anymore.”
Feng Qi asked with great interest, “Hey, was my personality really that different from the way I was before? Then who do you think is better? It should be me, right?”
“..................”
Feng Qi seemed exceptionally concerned about this question and urged him quietly, “Come on, tell me. Who’s better?”
“You. It’s you.” Ji Chaoyun pressed his fingers to his brow and answered helplessly.
He had originally thought that once Feng Qi learned the truth, he would stop being so fixated on drinking his own vinegar.
Who would have thought...
“One thing is one thing, and another is another.” Feng Qi spoke with utmost seriousness. “Even if I’m Feng Xiao reborn, what he did has nothing to do with me. How can something from a previous life be counted against me?”
“Besides, no matter who I am, that doesn’t stop me from disliking him.”
“...”
Ji Chaoyun silently looked at him and decisively decided not to discuss this matter with him any further.
He acknowledged that they were destined for each other in their previous life yet refused to admit that anything his previous self had done had anything to do with him. He claimed every advantage for himself while being overbearing and completely unreasonable.
How could anyone be like this?
Ji Chaoyun grumbled inwardly. Then something suddenly occurred to him. Just as he was about to speak, Feng Qi placed a finger against his lips.
“Shh.” Feng Qi said softly, “I know what you’re worried about. Let’s not talk about that yet.”
His finger slowly moved downward until it rested over the core at Ji Chaoyun’s chest. “I haven’t congratulated you yet. You’ve regained your Dragon Pearl and restored your cultivation.”
“Welcome back, little dragon.”
Ji Chaoyun stared at him blankly, and his eyes abruptly reddened.
Feng Qi said, “From now on, you can soar through the skies again. You can use your spells as you please and once more cultivate to the very pinnacle. Everyone will praise your extraordinary talent. No matter where you came from, they will respect you, admire you, and envy you.”
“You may not be accustomed to it at first, but that’s all right. I’ll stay with you while you adjust. I’ll stay beside you while you take back, little by little, everything that should have been yours.”
Feng Qi lowered his head and reverently kissed the back of Ji Chaoyun’s hand. “My little dragon deserves every beautiful thing in this world.”
Ji Chaoyun finally could not hold back any longer. Tears streamed down his cheeks.
Feng Qi pressed Ji Chaoyun’s head against his chest and laughed softly. “Crybaby... When you first came to the academy, you were like a little hedgehog, pricking anyone who came near you. And now? Count how many times you’ve cried in front of me.”
Ji Chaoyun’s voice trembled. “It’s all because of you...”
“All right, blame me.” Feng Qi said, “Cry all you want. If that isn’t enough, you can even bite me. I promise I won’t hit back or curse you— hiss!”
Before he could finish, Ji Chaoyun turned his head and bit him on the collarbone.
When Ji Chaoyun raised his head again, a vivid red bite mark had appeared beneath Feng Qi’s loosened collar.
Feng Qi sucked in a breath from the pain, then laughed. “Biting people at random. You’re like a little puppy.”
Ji Chaoyun ignored him. He lowered his head and gently licked the wounded spot. “What you said just now wasn’t right.”
“What?”
Ji Chaoyun gently licked and kissed the small patch of skin in soothing strokes. “I’ve already had the most beautiful thing in this world for a long time.”
He raised his head. Droplets still clung to his damp lashes, trembling without falling.
Feng Qi closed his eyes and laughingly begged for mercy. “Don’t tempt me anymore. Keep doing that and we really won’t get around to discussing anything serious.”
Ji Chaoyun had been thoroughly exhausted by Feng Qi the day before. Even thinking about it now left him apprehensive. He hurriedly shrank back and pulled the quilt around himself until he was wrapped up tightly. “My cultivation hasn’t stabilized yet. We can’t spirit cultivate.”
“Mm, no spirit cultivation. I was only teasing you.” Feng Qi wiped the moisture from the corner of his eye. “Didn’t you want to ask what we’re supposed to do next?”
Ji Chaoyun nodded. “Mm.”
Feng Qi did not answer immediately. Instead, he asked, “You already knew who I was on Mount Sumeru, but you never told me. Did my elder brother say something to you?”
“You guessed that too.”
“It isn’t difficult to guess.” Feng Qi sighed. “The legend of phoenix nirvana has existed since ancient times, yet no one has ever witnessed it, and no one knows what the outcome would be. Whether I can recover Feng Xiao’s memories, identity, and divine power, no one knows. Revealing it recklessly might not necessarily be a good thing.”
“I-I originally... promised His Majesty the Phoenix Lord that I would keep it secret.” Ji Chaoyun pressed his lips together. His fingers emerged from beneath the quilt and intertwined with Feng Qi’s. “But I’m terrible at hiding things, and I can’t deceive you.”
“You did well enough.” Feng Qi said, “If our positions were reversed, I wouldn’t care about the greater situation or anyone’s safety. The moment I discovered who you were, I would have rushed over, grabbed you by the collar, and demanded to know why you’d forgotten me.”
Ji Chaoyun blinked. “Then... what if I still couldn’t remember?”
“If you still couldn’t remember...”
Feng Qi lowered his head to Ji Chaoyun’s ear, enunciating each word softly and clearly. “Then I’d lock you away and take you somewhere no one else could find. Day and night, I’d spirit cultivate with you. While bullying you, I’d tell you everything that happened between us in the past and make you repeat it back to me bit by bit. Every time you got a single thing wrong, we’d do it again, until all those memories were carved into your bones and you could never forget them again.”
Ji Chaoyun shuddered and could not help shrinking farther inward, yet a secret trace of anticipation inexplicably arose in his heart. He pulled the quilt higher, hiding half his face, and muttered something under his breath.
Feng Qi narrowed his eyes. “What are you secretly cursing me about?”
“...Nothing.” Ji Chaoyun said as though nothing had happened. “We’re discussing serious matters. What should we do now?”
Feng Qi raised an eyebrow at him but did not pursue his painfully abrupt change of subject. “I want to remember what happened before my nirvana.”
“Even though I know who I am now, I still can’t remember anything.” Feng Qi said, “Feng Xiao’s memories and divine power seem to have been sealed within my sea of consciousness by some immensely powerful force. My current strength isn’t enough to open it.”
“Then is there any way to open it?”
Feng Qi smiled. “Didn’t you say you didn’t want me to remember? Yesterday, you even wanted to throw away the Scarlet Feather Sword.”
“I...” Ji Chaoyun whispered, “I truly didn’t want you to learn any of this, but who could have known...”
Who could have known that their spirit cultivation yesterday would become so... intense that the stimulation of their spiritual power would cause Ji Chaoyun’s Dragon Pearl to condense ahead of time?
Once the Dragon Pearl formed, there was no hiding anything anymore.
Ji Chaoyun asked, “Do you have some way to recover your memories?”
Feng Qi pondered for a moment, then smiled. “There is indeed one method. Perhaps we could try it.”
“What is it?”
Feng Qi did not answer. Instead, he looked at Ji Chaoyun with faint dissatisfaction.
Ji Chaoyun asked, “...What?”
“I’ve only just realized that you truly have no sense of romance.” Feng Qi propped up his chin and sighed, shaking his head.
Ji Chaoyun: “?”
Feng Qi leaned down until their foreheads touched and whispered, “Little dragon, I can’t remember a single thing from our past. Aren’t you angry? Aren’t you hurt? Aren’t you sad?”
Ji Chaoyun grew inexplicably uncomfortable beneath his gaze and turned his head away. “I... of course I’m sad. That’s why I’m asking you how we can restore your memories.”
“Wrong.” Feng Qi looked at him as though lamenting his hopelessness. “I already told you exactly what you should do. Are you really this foolish, or are you pretending?”
Ji Chaoyun froze. Remembering what Feng Qi had said earlier, the tips of his ears instantly turned red. “I-I-I... You said we weren’t going to spirit cultivate!”
“We’re not.” Feng Qi slowly loosened his sash and tilted his head with a smile. “So I’ll remember to seal both our spiritual powers. Don’t worry. It won’t affect you.”
He lowered his head and affectionately nuzzled Ji Chaoyun’s hair, his voice gentle.
“We still have plenty of time. More than enough for you to slowly and carefully tell me everything that happened between us in the past. Don’t worry. This time, I definitely won’t forget.”
☁︎₊˚⊹ The Author’s Jade-Slip Aside ⊹˚₊☁︎
I spent another whole day running around the hospital today. Sorry the update is late.
Also, this doesn’t count as recovering his memories. Looks like we’ll still have to wait until next week orz
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