Chapter 66 — With My Scores I Could Only Get Into…
Yu Fan had not cried in a long time. Crying was weakness, cowardice, a loss of face. The moment he realized he was crying, he tried to force it back.
But Chen Jingshen’s hand pressed some kind of switch, and Yu Fan could not hold it in at all.
So there he was, hair being ruffled while tears slipped out, ashamed even as it happened.
… So freaking embarrassing.
Summer rain comes fast and goes fast. The clatter on the tin awning gradually softened. Yu Fan kept his face buried in Chen Jingshen’s T-shirt, recklessly thinking he would not get up until the fabric dried.
Creak.
A muffled, faint sound. Yu Fan’s heart jumped, and he sprang away from Chen at once.
He braced a hand on the stair rail and tipped his head back in a wary panic. The old staircase stretched up into darkness, dead quiet.
“What is it?” Chen Jingshen looked up with him.
Yu Fan listened for a long time. That short noise did not come again, and no one came down. Dazed, he asked, “Did you hear something?”
“No.”
Had he imagined it?
Yu Fan had lived in this building more than ten years. That sound just now was like an unoiled hinge giving a single strained scrape.
But it was so light that even he could not tell if it was real or in his head.
He hesitated, then went halfway up to check. The second-floor door was shut. Everything was exactly as it had been when he had come down.
“What did you hear?” Chen asked quietly. He started after Yu Fan, but Yu Fan blocked him after two steps.
“Nothing. I misheard.”
That one little sound yanked him out of his emotions and back to reality. This was the stairwell of his building. Dense rows of apartments all around. People did not need to come close to see them.
Once he was sure the stairwell was empty, he exhaled and blinked his dry, aching eyes.
He had always been like this. Crying left an aftershock. Swollen lids, red rims, and it took a long time to fade. Back when Yu Kaiming hit him, Yun Shan had not only iced his bruises but also his eyes.
Chen Jingshen looked twice at those reddened eyelids, and the next second Yu Fan raised a hand and covered his eyes.
“What are you staring at?” He grabbed Chen’s shirt and said flatly, “Let’s go.”
The rain had eased. The big black umbrella Chen had brought barely fit two boys under it.
As they left the complex, Yu Fan could not help looking back. One hand still shielded his eyes and he tilted his head very high.
The window on the second floor was dark, no one inside.
“Can you see the road?” Chen glanced at his boyfriend, who was carrying far too much in his head.
“Use your brain.” Yu Fan lowered his gaze to the sidewalk. “I am not blind.”
“Want to buy eye drops…”
“Shut it, Chen Jingshen.” The hand over his face clenched and then loosened. “Or I will beat you till you forget your own name.”
Chen tipped the umbrella forward to cover his own face too.
“If you laugh I will hit you,” came another cold warning from his side.
“Where are we going?” Chen asked.
Libraries were brutal in summer. At this hour they would never find a seat, so Yu Fan took him to the internet cafe he usually went to. It was near the old complex, even more run-down than Bad Boy.
They had not eaten breakfast or lunch. Chen went around the two shops next door, and when he came back with two cups of oden, he saw his boyfriend kicked back, legs crossed, eyes narrowed and brows drawn, glowering at the screen.
He set the food down and glanced at the page. A big title read: “Admission Cutoffs for Jiangcheng Universities.”
Yu Fan had not seriously considered where he wanted to go to college, but he knew with Chen Jingshen’s grades he would be aiming for the elite schools in Jiangcheng.
Chen picked up a radish piece and held it to Yu Fan’s mouth. Yu Fan kept looking at the screen, turned his head, and took a bite.
“Chen Jingshen.” He scrolled to the bottom and said without expression, “No more running away together.”
“Why?”
“Cannot get in.” Yu Fan did the math. With his current score, he could only get into the school cafeteria to wash dishes.
Chen lifted a finger and stopped a few centimeters from the screen. He tapped several school names. “These are possible.”
Yu Fan turned to him, face blank. “Chen Jingshen, I am more than a hundred points below their cutoff.”
“Yeah. We still have a year.” Chen nudged a fish ball toward him.
Yu Fan met his gaze for a moment, then lowered his head and bit the fish ball.
Since they were here, after he filled his stomach Yu Fan picked up his phone and pinged the group to find people to play a match.
Everyone else needed a minute to get online. Lounging in his chair, eyes drifting, Yu Fan’s gaze slid to Chen’s monitor.
“…”
Chen Jingshen was looking at listings for places that fit “Jiangcheng, double bed, convenient transport, quiet and spacious.” He was about to click on a decent-looking one when the mouse moved by itself, slid to the X in the upper right, and closed the tab.
Yu Fan let go of his hand on the mouse and turned back to his own screen, ears burning. His announcement came out stiff.
“Chen Jingshen, I'll be living on campus.”
They stayed in the cafe all day. By the time Chen went home, it was late.
He pulled up his pinned contact, typing as he unlocked his door. When he pushed it open and saw the light inside, his fingers paused.
“Yes? That is great. I have been thinking about it these days and was planning to come see you… It needs a guardian signature to finalize? Sure, no problem, of course I will sign. When it is confirmed, please let me know.”
The chandelier lit the elegant living room. Ji Lianyi sat on the sofa, posture poised even on the phone. Hearing the door, she looked over and gave a small polite smile. “All right, talk next time.”
She hung up and stood. “Where were you? It is late. Did you eat?”
“I did.” Chen put his phone away.
“I asked the housekeeper to leave some soup. Have a little before you sleep.”
“No need,” Chen said. “Why are you back? You said you would be busy until next week.”
“It wrapped early.” Ji Lianyi rubbed her brow. “The company is moving most operations back to China. Your dad and I finalized the divorce. From now on, unless something urgent comes up, I do not need to fly out again.”
Chen stood quiet for a moment, then asked, “Are you okay?”
She blinked, then nodded. “I am fine. It was handled well.”
Because the other party had cheated, and even had a child older than Chen, what she got in the settlement exceeded what she had imagined.
“Your most crucial year is about to start, Jingshen. Mom can finally stay home and keep you company.” She smiled. “I have already found an apartment in Jiangcheng. When you get in, I will go with you and—”
“No. I will rent a place myself.” Chen cut her off mildly.
She stalled. “No. Renting is unsafe, and not clean.”
Before, Chen would have let it slide. That had been their pattern. She said it, he followed, rarely resistant.
“I will rent a place myself,” he repeated.
“…”
Her smile pulled taut, then faded. Mother and son stared at each other a moment in silence.
Senior year was coming. She could not pick a fight now. Seniors were fragile.
There would still be a year. They could hash it out after the exams.
“We can talk later,” Ji Lianyi said, face tightening then easing. “By the way, school starts next week, right? I will drive you to register.”
Maybe because they had not come to blows, even after a fight Yu Kaiming stayed home.
They continued to treat each other like air. The day before school started, Yu Fan came back with a package and kicked the sofa where Yu Kaiming was lying.
Eyes on the game, Yu Kaiming did not lift his head. “What.”
“Are you still in touch with her?”
He knew exactly who “her” meant. “No. F*** off, you are blocking the TV.”
Yu Fan did not believe it and made him hand over his phone. He checked the messages one by one, finally exhaled, and tossed it back.
“Hey! If you break it you are buying me a new one. I said no, and you still do not believe…” He fiddled with the phone, then said, “How come you are not going out lately?”
Yu Fan had been turning back to his room. He paused and looked over, puzzled.
Two seconds of silence. “… Sick of you walking in front of me every day,” Yu Kaiming muttered. “You are annoying.”
Yu Fan could not be bothered. He slammed his door.
Chen Jingshen’s mother had been traveling nonstop for half a year. Now that she was back, she had dinners to arrange with her family’s relatives and sometimes hosted people at home. Each time she brought Chen along, and time vanished. So the two of them only made it to the library once. The rest of the days they were back to video calls and going over problems.
School was starting soon anyway. It did not matter.
Yu Fan opened his package and took out a camera, then looked around the room for a place to install it.
People bought these things to watch their cats. It would ping his phone whenever it detected motion.
After the last time Yu Kaiming rifled through his stuff, Yu Fan had grown cautious. With school about to start, he would not be able to focus in class without it.
It was easy to set up. After he checked it a few times on his phone, he flopped onto the bed and scrolled through the apps he had left open.
The person who had sworn black-and-white that he would live on campus had gone home and still could not help himself. He had started browsing apartments too.
The farther he scrolled, the deeper his frown. He tugged at the hair on his forehead.
Why were rents in Jiangcheng all this expensive??
He tossed the phone aside and stared at the ceiling, doing the math on his savings. His mom had been out of work for a long time before she left, so she had not left much. These years’ living expenses had come from what his grandpa left him.
Back then, Yu Kaiming was hooked on a kind of gambling where there was a draw every minute. Money bled out like water. Nothing would talk him down. Grandpa thought the case was hopeless, and father and son were already at odds, so when he passed he left almost nothing for Yu Kaiming. He stuffed it all to Yu Fan in secret.
It was not a huge amount. After these years, most of it was gone.
Yu Fan clicked his tongue and rubbed his face in regret. If only he had smoked less. Cigarettes were so expensive…
He was still thinking about working his way through university when his phone buzzed several times in a row on the blanket.
The annoying class group was scheduling a class basketball game for the first day back.
[Zuo Kuan: Settled then. Losers treat the winners to spicy hot pot. I am ordering the forty yuan serving.]
[Wang Lu’an: No problem. Just you wait. Yu Fan is gonna wreck your rim tomorrow.]
[Zuo Kuan: If you have the guts, do not let Chen Jingshen guard me!]
[Wang Lu’an: Are you dumb? That is the position the top student plays!]
[Wang Lu’an: @- @ChenJingshen Brothers, decide your spicy hot pot toppings in advance. Make them go broke.]
Free food dropping out of the sky was not bad when you were broke. Yu Fan tapped out: We can schedule a few more games…
He was about to send it when a new message popped up.
[s: Yu Fan and I are leaving right after the game. We are skipping dinner.]
Yu Fan: “?”
[Wang Lu’an: Huh? Where are you two going?]
[s]: We have other plans.
Yu Fan: “?”
Do we? What plans?
Surely he did not mean going back to the classroom to do problems after basketball.
Yu Fan stared at the screen for a beat. Then he got off the bed, ears red, and stuffed a few sticks of gum into the backpack he had already packed.
The chat was still lively.
[Wang Lu’an: Fine, then Yu Fan’s and the top student’s portions go to Sister Jing and Ke Ting.]
[Zuo Kuan: F*** off. You cannot stand losing even a little? Who is filling those two slots for your class?]
[Wang Lu’an: Wu Si and Gao Shi.]
[Wu Si: Huh? What are we talking about? I just saw.]
[Wang Lu’an: Tomorrow’s game. Desk mate, I signed you up. After school, crush them.]
Wu Si did not reply, probably scrolling back through the chat.
Wang Lu’an and Zuo Kuan traded threats for a bit. Just as the conversation was about to shift back to borrowing homework to copy, Wu Si’s avatar popped up again.
[Wu Si: Class game? The top student and I cannot play.]
[Wu Si: You did not hear? The school is bringing back the honors class.]
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