Chapter 30 — Now You Know I Secretly Like You
Yu Fan leaned against the wall, elbow propped up, head resting in his palm, eyes half shut. He had not been that sleepy, but the sun was warm, the math period was Zhuang Fangqin reciting numbers and formulas that might as well be a lullaby in his ear.
After ten minutes of nodding off, his head suddenly dipped and was about to smack the desk. A cool touch caught his forehead.
Yu Fan blinked through the haze and saw Chen Jingshen’s fingers, pen pinched between them. Between those knuckles was a glimpse of a sharp jaw and the line of an Adam’s apple. If not for the hand braced against Yu Fan’s forehead, you would think he was listening to the lecture.
Chen Jingshen’s eyes slid down to meet his. In the spring light they looked at each other for two seconds. The place where that hand pressed felt like a jolt of current, and Yu Fan’s sleep flew off like a startled bird.
He snapped out of it, slapped Chen Jingshen’s hand away, and sat up straight with a wooden face.
Zhuang Fangqin had thought Yu Fan was only trying to skip the daily ritual of being woken up. She did not expect that during the next two periods, when she patrolled the hallway and peeked in, Yu Fan would actually be awake. Each time their eyes met through the window, both of their expressions were a little hard to read.
At the lunch bell, Zhuang Xianjing turned and saw Yu Fan and Wang Lu’an collapse onto their desks in sync with the chime.
“Something wrong with you two?” she laughed as she touched up her lip balm. “No sleeping in class, but sleeping after class?”
Wang Lu’an wanted to sleep forever, but his stomach growled. “You think I want to? Someone was determined to make me grind. I sat up like a bamboo pole all morning. With my discipline-committee desk mate having no one to police, he zeroed in on me. Wrote my name down twice in one period. Who the f*** dares to sleep like that…”
He tapped Yu Fan’s desk. “King of grind, what was that this morning. You did not touch the desk once.”
Wasn’t that because someone would not mind his own business.
A pen cap clicked shut beside him.
“I…” Yu Fan clenched his jaw, sat up again, and squeezed out, “I am not sleepy.”
Wang Lu’an stared. If you did not have that coffin face, I might buy it.
“Come on, cafeteria. I am starving,” Wang Lu’an said, rubbing his belly. “We sleep after we eat.”
Yu Fan grunted, head tilted as he dug for the phone he had not had the energy to touch all morning.
“Wait, I am coming,” Zhuang Xianjing said, straightening her uniform. She glanced at the boy behind them and asked lightly, “Top student, want to eat with us?”
“Mm.” Chen Jingshen slid his book into the drawer. He thought a moment, then turned his head and lowered his voice. “Can I?”
Zhuang Xianjing: “?”
Wang Lu’an: “…?”
Yu Fan stuffed his phone in his pocket and headed for the back door. “Up to you. The cafeteria is not mine.”
Yu Fan drew eyes wherever he went on campus. That was how he had gotten notorious here in the first place. Add in the grade’s top student, whose face could go toe to toe with Yu Fan’s, and as soon as Wang Lu’an stepped inside he swore everyone’s chopsticks paused. The attention fed his vanity so well he stopped being sleepy.
The cafeteria was jammed. Even with the big doors and windows open it was hot. The old wall fans spun their heads and whined. Zuo Kuan had come early and saved seats.
They returned with trays. Zhuang Xianjing wanted to wave Chen Jingshen into the spot across from her, but Wang Lu’an dropped his tray there first. After a few failed looks, she could only watch Chen Jingshen sit diagonally across from her.
Chen Jingshen glanced at the lunch opposite him. Two veg and one meat. Respectable.
“Yu Fan,” Zuo Kuan said mysteriously. “Guess who sat across from me just now.”
“Who?”
“Ding Xiao.” Zuo Kuan slapped his thigh and grinned. “Hilarious. The second he saw you, he ran and left his food. He had been there two minutes.”
Yu Fan was not impressed. “Oh.”
“Boring.” Zuo Kuan clicked his tongue.
Someone asked, “Wang Lu’an, did your homeroom teacher get the KTV photos too?”
“Yeah, I got called into the office first thing,” he said, annoyed. “Hey, Zuo Kuan, what is with that QQ group? You are the owner. Do you know who spread them?”
“If I knew, would I not have told you?”
“Why am I so unlucky. We just got caught last week…”
Yu Fan said nothing. Short on sleep, he wore a stormy face. Every student who passed near him instinctively muted themselves, afraid he would upend a tray over their head.
He ate fast. It was a habit he picked up years ago. Across from him, Chen Jingshen sat straight-backed. His tray was full and barely touched, the spoon holding a few isolated corn kernels like he was eating a 168-yuan shrimp and corn at a Western restaurant.
They were still talking about the photos when Yu Fan finally snapped, lifting his eyes mid-bite. “…What the f*** are you staring at?”
“Nothing.” Chen Jingshen sank the spoon into his rice and, like Yu Fan, scooped a heaping spoonful and ate.
Two cute girls wandered past their table three times. No one noticed except Zhuang Xianjing. She followed their gaze and landed on Chen Jingshen’s face. She sipped yogurt and tipped her chin. “Top student, those two girls… they used to be in your class, right?”
Chen Jingshen looked over. “Maybe.”
So grades and pretty girls do nothing for you either.
On a whim she set down her chopsticks. “Top student, have you really never liked anyone?”
Before he could answer, Zuo Kuan already frowned. “Obviously not. Look at him. Does he seem like the type to date early? His heart is set on studying. He will consider that stuff after work in the future. Stop tossing ideas around.”
Chen Jingshen said nothing.
Zhuang Xianjing knitted her brows, about to ask what business of his it was, when Jingshen spoke, mild as ever. “Not quite. I do like someone.”
“Kh—” Yu Fan choked on rice. He turned his head and hacked his lungs out.
The table went silent for several beats.
Wang Lu’an: “F***.”
Zuo Kuan: “…”
Zhuang Xianjing: “F***. For real? Who?”
Yu Fan turned back to say something, but another cough hijacked him.
“Inconvenient to say,” Chen Jingshen said.
“Could not tell, top student!” Wang Lu’an gasped, then patted Yu Fan’s back. “You okay?”
“Give us something,” Zhuang Xianjing begged. “Same school? What type? Are you together?”
“No. I am… crushing.” Chen Jingshen’s face was calm, voice like he was answering a quiz. “The cute type, I guess.”
Yu Fan coughed like smoke was coming out.
No one expected him to be so blunt. It stunned the table. A face like that, and it is still an unrequited crush?
Zuo Kuan looked at him with newfound respect. “Who has taste that high? Are you just shy and did not confess?”
He is shy my a**. And you are the one who likes him, so why are you so excited?
Yu Fan was nearly done coughing when Wang Lu’an’s well-meaning smack set him off again.
“I confessed,” Chen Jingshen said lightly.
“Wha—” Zhuang Xianjing choked.
“How about this,” she pivoted in a heartbeat, “tell me who it is and I will design a pursuit plan. With your stats, I guarantee that in one month… one week she is yours. You handle my future exams for me in return. Deal?”
Chen Jingshen was about to answer when a chopstick clapped the tray with a crack and the person across from him stood up hard enough to rattle the table.
Wang Lu’an jumped. He knew that look. It was the same face Yu Fan wore right before he took someone into an alley last time.
What now?
He opened his mouth, but Yu Fan’s already flushed face tightened. He bit out the words. “You done?”
Chen Jingshen set his chopsticks down. “Mm.”
“Go back with me.”
“Okay.”
Before the others could figure it out, Yu Fan was already marching him off.
“They are… going back to the classroom, right?” Wang Lu’an said. “Not to some corner to fight?”
It was lunch break. Most classmates had gone home or to the dorm, or were still eating. The classroom was empty.
Yu Fan sat down so hard his chair screeched backward. He tossed his phone on the desk and snapped, “Why not head to the broadcast booth and tell the whole school you are in love with me.”
Chen Jingshen thought for two seconds. “Can I?”
“If you want a fight, yes.”
“I only answered their question,” Chen Jingshen said after a pause. “I did not say your name. Is that still not allowed?”
“No.” Yu Fan ground his teeth. “You are not allowed to show even a little.”
“Got it.” Chen Jingshen leaned back, hands loose on his knees. “I will secretly like you.”
How could someone be this shameless and say something like that with a straight face.
On the way back Yu Fan had planned exactly how he would lay down the law. One line from Chen Jingshen and the whole warning turned to fluff.
He raked his hair, yanked his jacket from the drawer, spread it on the desk and dropped onto it.
A few seconds later the voice came. “Should I wake you for afternoon class?”
“Do not. Scram.”
Chen Jingshen lowered his head and did two problems. When the breathing beside him settled, he rested the end of his pen on the paper and quietly turned his face.
Yu Fan had unconsciously settled into the position he liked. Half his face showed beyond his arm. The light stung, and he lightly knit his brows. Afternoon sun stretched soft across his skin, even the tiny hairs clear.
Looking at the shadow of those lashes, Chen Jingshen could not tell whether this was real or another old dream.
The weather was especially nice. Hu Pang did not go back to the teacher dorms at noon. He wandered the building balconies with his hands behind his back. Passing Class 7, he glanced in.
He met Chen Jingshen’s eyes as the boy gently stood up. Seeing the top student working through lunch, Hu Pang felt pleased, and even that back-of-the-head of the grade’s last-place student beside him looked more agreeable.
He smiled and opened his mouth to say something. Chen Jingshen gave him a cool nod first.
Hu Pang nodded back automatically, then froze. Wait. Why did that feel familiar?
Before he could place it, there was a quiet swish. His view turned entirely blue.
Chen Jingshen had pulled the inner blue curtain shut.
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